It's the past. Stop finding please. Threw it long time ago. Had enough of that life. Nothing good about it. Grabbing innocent people. Beat them up as and when you like. Killing them with what you got in your hands.
Feeling good about it. Didn't think what if it happens to you. Killing is your life. Being proud about it. It's a no for goodness sake. Stop being proud of it. Stop hurting the innocent. Staring is not wrong, they have eyes.
Stop finding fault for nothing. Let them find you. Stand your ground. (Green street hooligan) Don't just sit there if they find you. Haunt them down. Give them all you got and show them who you are. You're not a coward or a nerd who always get bullied. Don't think that you don't know what to do.
Doesn't mean you drop, you always going to drop. Everyone will have their first fight in life. :)